
I'm Not Really Here
Paul Lake
Paul Lake was Manchester born, a City fan from birth. His footballing talent was spotted at a young age and, in 1983, he signed coveted schoolboy forms for City. Only a short time later he was handed the team captaincy.
An international career soon beckoned and, after turning out for the England under-21 and B teams, he received a call-up to the England training camp for Italia '90. Earmarked as an England captain in the making, Paul became a target for top clubs like Manchester United, Arsenal, Spurs and Liverpool, but he always stayed loyal to his beloved club, deeming Maine Road the spiritual home at which his destiny lay.
But then, in September 1990, disaster struck. Paul ruptured his cruciate ligament; sustaining the worst possible injury that a footballer can suffer. And so began his nightmare.
Neglected, ignored and misunderstood by his club after a succession of failed operations, Paul's career began to fall apart. Watching from the sidelines as similarly injured players regained their fitness, he spiralled into a prolonged bout of severe depression. With an enforced retirement from the game he adored, the death of his father and the collapse of his marriage, Paul was left a broken man.
Set against a turning point in English football, I'm Not Really Here is the powerful story of love and loss and the cruel, irreparable damage of injury; of determination, spirit and resilience and of unfulfilled potential and broken dreams.
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About Paul Lake
Reviews for I'm Not Really Here
The Sports Diaries
Best football autobiography ever? Unquestionably
Metro
It's the best book I've read for a long time....Beautifully, powerfully written, it is particularly raw and unsparing...
Oliver Holt
The Mirror
...an astounding football autobiography.
The Guardian
I'd be frightened to put a price on his head these days ... Paul was as good a young player as I've ever worked with.
Howard Kendall
Without question, he is the best young player I have ever worked with
Mel Machin
You would class Paul in the top bracket. I always likened him to Colin Bell - he had that great ability to get up and down the park.
Tony Book
It was like having one of your mates playing for City. He would've captained England. No question. He was - and remains - one of us
Noel Gallagher
Paul Lake was the most gifted in the group of young players who brightened Manchester City up for fans in the 1980s who were pining for the glory days to return...his is an inspirational human story
David Conn
The Guardian
His memoir - I'm Not Really Here - spares nothing in the raw details of what Lake endured. A football read even more harrowing than an England player's World Cup diary
Sport